After a rough night of pregnancy, I woke up pretty discouraged and worn down. Although I am thankful for the process and feel very blessed, I don’t enjoy the nine months that precede holding our brand new baby in my arms. For some reason God chose for our children to be born half grown which causes for a very large momma (what I call a beached whale.) This pregnancy has brought about other health issues that no one but my mom really cares to hear about.
So, I woke up this morning feeling pretty discouraged because frankly I don’t feel good. The clock said that it was too early to call my mom. Although, that was exactly what I wanted to do. I knew as soon as she said, “Hello” that I would burst into tears, give her my sob story, and then feel better. (Another reason why I don’t like pregnancy is because typically I never cry and pregnancy makes me an emotional wreck.)
I started to pine away the minutes until I could call for my self-pity party when the Holy Spirit said, “Go to the Word.” Yeah, but I just want my Mommy. She will understand, I will cry, and then I will feel better. “Come to Me and be refreshed.”
Since I am in between devotional studies, I headed to the faithful Our Daily Bread website. I clicked on the scripture link to Ephesians 5:1-7 looking for refreshment. I got about halfway down to v4: “but rather thanksgiving.” Honestly, I didn’t get a lot out of the rest of the devo or Bible reading but I can’t get those words out of my mind.
It was as though a rushing river flowed through me taking my eyes off my hurts, my frustrations – me – and turned my eyes up to Heaven with thanksgiving.
I will still call my mom this morning but I know that the conversation is going to be different.