A few weeks ago, I blogged about the horrific behavior we were seeing out of Bubs. It was truly the worst six days that we had had since starting therapy. Seriously the choices that he was making worried me. But it was the look in his eyes that truly scared me. It was a look that showed defiance, a stronghold, and rebellion. The exact opposite of the typical loving, adoration, and innocence in my little boy’s eyes.
This is the not the first for these eyes. I have seen them in the past when we went through extended rough patches.
On the sixth day, Bubs attended the Mother’s-Day-Out program at our church. As a rule, there has not be a lot of discipline in his classroom but he loves attending. There are three other boys in the class that he has become buds with. I explained to the teacher that we were in a very rough spell. I asked that she stay on top of things as I knew he could spirl out of control very quickly. I kept my phone close by as I wouldn’t be suprised to receive a phonecall that day.
That afternoon, I saw Bubs in the hallway as I approached to check him out. By the look in his eyes, I could tell I had Bubs back. I knew right then that our stent was over. It wasn’t that Bubs was suddenly perfect. We would have typical preschool behavior. But…it would be typical.
Back to the “look”… Our OT couldn’t help. The internet is silent. Only one person has understood. A friend totally knew what I was talking about. She has seen the exact same look in her son who has been diagnosed with Asperger’s.
Do you understand? I would love to hear.
Is this the first time this has come up, I mean about Aspergers? Has anyone, Dr's etc, ever mentioned this? Just wondering…
mel
I can't say that I've been able to instantly tell when he has "returned", but I have noticed that he looks different, mostly his eyes, when he's in a rough patch. I've thought that they kind of "glaze over". Like I said before, it's like there's some kind of brain malfuction that affects every part of him. It's the weirdest thing. And, yeah, I've felt the same way, deepy concerned about the rebellion and strongholds that become so vividly present at those times. It's like all that is sin in him comes to the surface. Can be kind of scary, makes me wonder if he'll end up in jail or something. Turn away from the Lord. Makes me pray harder and trust God more (as opposed to myself) with his future. On another note, anyone have good ideas for dealing with lying? It's runnding rampant around here with ALL the kids! I told them today "you know that God HATES lying? and I hate it too" and my son says to me "I didn't know THAT" genuinely. (Proverbs 12:22) I really do HATE lying, it drives me crazy, I can't stand it.
my son was diagnosed with pervasive developmental disorder….which from what I understand also is in the autism spectrum…I'm very new at this because it was just yesterday that we received our diagnosis. I've known for awhile that he has various sensory issues…we've been in OT for several months now and that is helping some. I see what I imagine is a very similar look in his eyes when he is experiencing overload. Usually the only thing I can do is quickly remove him to a quiet place and hold him and talk very softly to him. I don't know if that works for anyone else but it seems to be the only thing that helps my kiddo. If anyone else has a kiddo with this pdd-nos then I would love to hear from you…I'm feeling sort of lost right now…I think interrupted expectations describes it perfectly.
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