I feel like I have a pretty good idea of how to handle a large part of Bubs’ sensory issues. But there is one that I am struggling with. That is silliness.
Bubs is excessively silly. Not just five-year-old-silly. I realize that this is common of these kids. I am talking over the top.
So, I turn the tables and ask for your help!! How do you handle the silliness?
The extreme sillyness at our house consists of almost non-stop (when he gets going) nonsense talk and silly names. He LOVES to rhyme. Where we've ended up with it is that we let him do it, with a few limitations. It has been a gradual process, adding the guidelines one by one. Saying "use real words", or "don't call names", and doling out consequences was getting us absolutely nowhere. He wasn't doing it with any malicous intent, so the consequences were only needed for the disobedience aspect. We decided it wasn't a battle worth fighting over and over. So we've "reframed" it as a game. I think that's how he's seen it all along, entertainment. I've explained to his friends (I do in-home childcare) that he is trying to play a silly game with them. So they could respond to "chicken doggy" with "duck cat" or to "hamburger" with "chicken nuggets" etc. Also, they've been taught to tell him "I don't want to play that game anymore", and "I don't like that name". Of course, he is not allowed to use a mean tone of voice or call names that are generally considered offensive (like "baby" for example). No silly names to strangers because they don't know how to play the game. He also needs to use their real names when greeting his friends in the morning or saying good bye to them. In the end, I do hope to eliminate the name calling all together, since it isn't typically socially acceptable. But for now, we're cutting back on it little by little, and view it as his way of playing with words and exploring humor. I think the key is to tackle it in bite-size pieces. Sillyness can be such a vague concept for kids to know what is ok and what is not. It was even hard for me to pinpoint what exactly I wanted to see change. So I would suggest trying to find a few specific reoccuring aspects of his over the top version of silly that you want to see cut out, and start there. It also helps to gauge progress, being able to see that at least he isn't doing that one part anymore or as much.
Also, I think often the non-stop chatter is his way of either fulfilling his desire for auditory input or of drowning out the noises that bother him. So, the other thing we do is give him headphones with music and that stops the babble too. You might want to look at his silly stuff through the lense of "Is there a sensory based reason he's doing this?". If there is something you can figure out, is might help to address that, and decrease the root cause of it, along with working on changing the "symptom" of it, the negative bahavior.
Thank Heather! I never thought about it from a sensory-hearing issue. GREAT idea!!! Thank you!