Friends, I have been under spiritual attack. Attack towards me as a wife, as a mother, and as the fingers behind ABCJLM.
It has been mounting for a few weeks but it finally hit the top on Friday. Other than days in which I have been overcome with extreme grief, Friday was the worse non-grief day I have ever had. My attitude was horrific and I could only see down. My stress level was at maximum thinking about all that I had to get done in the next several months. And, anything even remotely negative was eating away at the truth I stood on.
Knowing that prayer was my only answer, I posted on my Bible study’s group page asking for prayers. Within minutes, I received a phone call, text, and comments offering Bible verses, prayer, meals, visits, and an invite for supper. (Yes, I have an amazing set of girls surrounding me.)
In reading and listening to what they told me, I realized I had taken my eyes off Jesus. The enemy was attacking yet again and I was believing lies. I felt alone and unable to manage the ship. All I saw was the raging waves swirling around me and I looked down. But, Jesus softly took my chin in His hands and pulled my eyes back up.
With this understanding, my head came on board but my heart was still stirring. I had the end in sight but I still struggled with the waves hitting the side of my boat.
Needless to say it was a restless night. My prayers seemed to hit the ceiling and bounce back. I tossed and turned. My mind was a machine flipping out new thoughts and reasoning like a ticket booth at a carnival. My shoulders still felt heavy. What sleep I did get was not restful.
Morning finally came and I turned to the final week of our Bible study – Balance at the Speed of Life – for Women. The title was “Enjoy the Ride!”
Yep, not feeling it. This is not what I signed up for.
Author Barbara Folkerts started out…
When God is at the helm of the ship, we can lean back and enjoy the ride! He’s in control. We can breathe easier knowing He’s the Almighty, and we don’t have to be! We don’t have to stress about anything; instead, we pray. We make sure we’re using our time as He desires, and then we trust Him to work out the things that concern us.
Then Ms. Folkerts provided us with three scripture passages to guide the reader toward prayer and away from stress. We were instructed to begin each answer with the words, “I don’t have to live under stress because…”
At this point, I am blown away. This is SO GOD!!!! In my quiet time He hits me right where I need it.
So, I begin going through the verses that she provides.
- Eph 3:20
I don’t have to live under stress because He is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think.
- Phil 4:6-7
I don’t have to live under stress because I can present my request to God and the peace of God will surpass all I can understand.
- Rom 8:28
I don’t have to live under stress because we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him.
And I went on…Googling more verses to finish my sentence.
- Matthew 6:25,27
- John 14:1
- Proverbs 3:5-6
- Psalm 34:3
- Psalm 55:2
- John 14:27
- Psalms 62:8
- Hebrews 4:16
- Psalm 27
- Matthew 11:28-29
- Psalms 29:11
- Deut 31:6
- James 1;5
- I Peter 5:7
- Jeremiah 29:11
- 2 Timothy 1:7
- John 16:33
Each of these verses I wrote in my Prayer Journal under the “Me” section. And as I remembered why I don’t have to stress, I remembered who God is. And if God is in control of one area of my life, I have to believe He is over all.
Next, I went through and listed everything that I was stressing over.
God, I am stressing over…
– Getting it all done
– Hearing and doing Your will
– Bubs’ severe language delays
– Bubs’ social skills
– Bub’s severe reading delays
– Little Man’s obedience
– Sweet Pea not getting the time she needs
– Peanut’s lack of language
…and the list went on totaling 21 real life, large, daily stressors in which I am carrying right now. Each of the stressors are tied to a boat that I am trying to captain.
But as I was writing each one down, my eyes would glance back at the scriptures I had just read. And slowly but surely, the weight began to lift and I saw myself unclench my fingers from the wheel that I was tightly clinging to. The enemy had convinced me that I was alone in this and if I could simply stay in control, I could manage. Jesus said, “My precious child. Let go. I will take the lead. You follow.”
I don’t have to stress because…GOD!